...things are getting weird around here...
I know practically nothing about the financial markets. They're very (intentionally, I think) complicated, purposely opaque to those of us without the time or the patience to learn the jargon, navigate the maze of Rube Goldberg "financial instruments" and embrace the double-and-triple-negative hedge bets designed so that those with the wherewithal are able to win when everybody else is losing.
Greed, on the other hand, is pretty easy to understand, particularly among those on Wall Street who manage other people's money, and can therefore rationalize avaricious behaviors as benefitting those whose money is in their custody. When you make a big pile of fast money, you're "tending your flock"--the messianic complex can set in, and you can feel the applause (just off camera, to the left) as you shepherd that next big deal toward completion. It's easy to imagine a Wall Street "doer," patting himself on the back for the $3 billion he's just earned as a "fundit," and making a mental note to himself: "this is really risky...can't forget things could go south...gotta sleep with one eye open...don't worry, I'll come back to my senses tomorrow...we'll straighten all this out...just...one...[puff]...more...trade...[pant]...YES!! Another billion and a half!!"
Greed, I can understand--procrastination ("we'll do the dilligence tomorrow, I promise...") I can understand.
What I don't understand is the following statement: "It is unbridled corruption and greed that caused the crisis on Wall Street. We've got to FIX it!" --John McCain.
Fix it? Fix what? Fix GREED? I see...Mr. McCain proposes to ask people who spend their entire existence addicted to big deals and endless obscene profits to...what...check themselves into Betty Ford voluntarily? Suddenly decide that there's "something more important than making money?" Is he going to appeal to their "patriotism?" The same people who can't ship American jobs overseas fast enough to satisfy the stockholders? Is he going to appeal to their "better angels?" These people whose patron saint is Gordon Gecko? These people he's lain in bed with for decades, the hands that feed his campaign, his drinking buddies, his Sedona neighbors?
This is the same McCain, who, when asked whether or not he supported government action to help average citizens facing foreclosure, said, "the government shouldn't be in the business of bailing out people who've made irresponsible financial decisions." The implication here is that sub-prime mortgage customers should have "known better." Translation: If you're poor, or of merely modest means, you should recognize your station in life, and stop all this silly dreaming that you can actually afford a roof over your head that isn't owned by someone else.
But as long as you're rich, you've already succeeded in passing the "responsible/respectable" smell test, in the Republican view. You're not a deadbeat dad...your secretary mails out all your child support checks, right on time. Your 3 alimomy accounts are all up to date. Your credit cards have astronomical limits, and you pay your bills as soon as they come due. There are no mortgage companies hounding you, all your utilties are paid up, life is good--you're a "responsible citizen." Once your team of accountants has squeezed every possible cent in deductions and tax shelter opportunities (and your team of lobbyists has squeezed every available loophole and tax cut out of your polo buddies in Washington) you pay your tax bill every quarter. Wherever your "family values" or "moral compass" come into question, you write another check to cover your vices and put yourself back in good standing with the Robertsons and Falwells (who can't make it for polo on Sunday, 'cause they've gotta work...).
And since you are a citizen of such high moral character, what's a couple of hundred billion, really? If you screw up and blow half the US GDP on a bad business deal, your buds at the Fed will bail you out, no problem.
Yes, McCain's backpedaling about the "economic fundamentals" being "the American Worker" makes perfect sense. When the chips are down, the Wall Street "saints" can always rely on the rank-and-file millions to take another hit for "the team."
We're all on the same team, right? This is "America." What's good for Wall Street is good for Main Street, isn't it? It's those commies, those Democrats, that we have to worry about, not good, solid "American workers." When our boys on Wall Street are in trouble, it's up to the rest of us to suck it up, back their play...they've spent their lives selflessly committed to our "economic expansion," so now it's the least we can do, as taxpayers, to make sure they don't lose their second summer homes just because they made a little "arithmetic error."
"Fix" greed and corruption? Yup, yup-McCain's your man, all right--the maverick reformer, the Lone Ranger to the rescue. All you displaced manufacturing workers, computer programmers, design engineers...y'know, you salt-of-the-Earth Americans that so proudly we hail? Yup, the same folks to whom Mr. McCain has so humbly offered his services as vigilante-in-chief--he's got your back--don't worry--help is on the way, just as soon as we've taken care of the truly needy, those thanklessly toiling Wall Street pinstripes whose "Captain Economy" leotards were stained by the incompetent boobs at the cleaners this past week...
"It's just a little cash-flow problem. Things have been a little tight this month. We PROMISE we'll bring our accounts up to date...we're on the phone with Uncle Sam right now, and he's promised to cover us. Give us a break, will 'ya?"
But I digress...master McCain stands ready to "fix it!" So watch out, you dastardly minions of "greed and corruption!"
And you good, honest "average Americans," (you beautiful rubes, you Values-voters, you loyal Republican faithful...) Please, have faith, trust in the Lairds--just a few more months/years living out of garbage cans and paying off creditors on...well...Wall Street, and you'll be led out of misery, to the promised land.
Fear not!
The Dark Knight feels your pain. Justice will be done, but first he has to throw a little cocktail party out at Wayne Manor...
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